^^ One emoticon says it all ^^ (Okay...maybe two)

Sigh...to be yourself and to be what God wants you to be is truly the hardest bit in life. But then again, to know that others understand your pain only helps you live through it and even thrive! ^^

Thank you all for you e-mails. That is why we cannot stand alone as a Christian. We tend to look at ourselves so much that we forget that the people around us are human and they each have their own story to tell. Now I can look forward to a better day ^^ (So cliche...but true) And days for that matter. True and true and true. Sigh...Lord, you have truly been instrumental in doing this.

That's why we have to pour out our sorrows to one another. (Actually sins also) so that we can build each other up as 'iron sharpens iron'. ^^ I wrote the post below after coming back from that place and it seems to be right on the dot. I think... But thankfully, now I will just heal and be still in the presence of my beloved God AND his people.

By the way, below is a story I will be starting in this blog just for reading's sake and to hopefully give you an insight into the things I read. ^^ (God, send me a publisher :P) But anyways, erm...enjoy?

PS: Feel free to correct the grammatical or spelling errors. And no...I don't have a title yet.

--------

~1~

‘He dares not speak for the foundations of the world trembles as he breathes…’ Page XI of the Taeron Chronicles

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The night was still save for cricket chirping and the town would be thanking the gods because everyone knew that cricket chirping meant the end of a good, ordinary day. A day filled with nothing more than work, rest and two tankards of fresh ale. ‘I should be glad if this were my last day’ some grandfather would say should he be given the chance to. Yet, on the eve of that promising night, one soul was less fortunate than the rest for beneath the only bridge above Dwear River. ‘You be thinking that you be unlucky eh?’ The bandit muttered.

Xen nodded quietly, wincing as a drop of cold water splattered onto his head from the bridge above. ‘I said you be feeling unlucky?’ The bandit playfully moved his stiletto below the boy’s chin. Xen closed his eyes and nodded again, his fingers feeling the rough wall’s cold surface. Why…why did I have to cross paths with her?

#

‘And with me last stroke, I slay the dragon in its sleep,’ A voice echoed over the crowd’s roaring cheer. The bard bowed, twirling her flute to the tavern’s delight. Tables were pounded, tankards refilled and a chorus for some ancient war song fell from every lip. The innkeeper smiled to himself, surveying the situation. Business would be good thanks to this night’s entertainer but he had to keep an eye out in case some drunk fool decided that it was the right day to attack his neighbours. He felt a small tap on his arm and his heart skipped a beat. Foreseeing a starting punch through experience, he fell upon the person’s arm only to startle a small cloaked figure.

‘So sorry sir. Truly sorry…’ The innkeeper retreated. ‘Thought you were one of those starting punches you know? The starting…punch?’

The stranger said nothing. ‘Those…er…when the inn gets a little rowdy. Yeah…’ The innkeeper scratched the back of his head nervously. Still there was no response from the figure except to reach for his satchel. The innkeeper eyed with suspicion. Could this be one of those kingdom officials sent to tax small town inns? Or perhaps…an… assassin…his garb seems to match those of that kind…maybe one of the rival inns down the road had sent him… Quietly, he reached beneath the counter for his old club. Long had he not felt its weathered grip. Now may be the time to use it.

He looked around for some kind of help but all eyes were kept on the bard who was now singing of some far away land laden with gold and honey. If only there were such a place. I might not have left the adventuring life so early. The stranger had removed a green board from his bag, a stick of chalk and was now furiously scribbling on it. Sighing, he replaced the club. He is dumb. I should have known. The stranger held up his board with the words ‘Can I have a room and a tankard for tonight?’

‘Of course,’ The innkeeper said, smiling. ‘I still have a good room right at the end of the corridor above. Away from the tavern noise and the occasional drunkard pounding up the stair. Will that be adequate?’

More scribbling. I will think about it over a good dose of ale.

‘Dwear’s best brew coming up,’ The innkeeper said, turning to reach for a tankard. Smacking a barrel, he filled it to the brim. ‘So…where are you traveling to, friend?’ The innkeeper turned, setting the tankard gently on the counter.

The stranger kept silent for a moment, sipping the ale gently. ‘Do not worry. I used to travel and I know many an easier way should you require it,’ The innkeeper said, eyeing a group at the end of the hall. He cupped his hands around his mouth. ‘You there! Keep your fight out of my tavern!’

He turned back to see the stranger scribbling. I myself do not know.

‘I see…’ The innkeeper nodded. ‘I too have been faced with those in my life. Especially when I no companions. Heck, that was what made me jump into the adventuring life in the first place. Get a good companion and you get a good goal and something to look forward to.’

But even with a companion, where will I…(erase)…go?

‘The world’s your oyster boy! There are lands out there that beg for a good adventurer’s foot. And the things you see…’ The innkeeper said, staring dreamily at the ceiling. ‘…you will scar its imprint into your soul. They will be things I will never stop telling my grandchildren.’

The innkeeper took the stranger’s empty cup. ‘But that will depend all on you. The adventuring life isn’t for everyone.’ He turned to refill the cup. ‘Some just decide to…settle down…’ The cup and its contents swished with as he emphasized. ‘Just imagine the things you would be missing (swish), the lands left untouched (swish) and a king’s treasure laid before you very eyes!’ The cup was slammed against the counter and half of its contents onto the floor. ‘But…there you have it…the adventuring life isn’t for everybody.’

‘Yes ig ish,’ A man stumbled beside the stranger, nudging him.

‘You, get out of my tavern. You’ve had too much drink already and you are disturbing my customers,’ The innkeeper said.

‘And whats if me dun…? You wen to pick fight wit meh?’ The drunk lifted his fists, stumbling back uneasily and knocking into a passing barmaid. The tankards she held fell onto a table and those who were seated there. ‘What you doing!? You get me all wet!’ A voice cried out. A clumsy fist flailed out and caught the shouter in the face. A blow came back, launching the drunk into another table. Soon, tankards and chairs became tools of war and tables made good shields.

‘Darn it! I had to start it this time,’ The innkeeper groaned. He reached for his club and got ready to defend his barrels. He caught a glance of the dumb stranger hurrying out the tavern door, bending low to avoid detection. The blessings of the gods be upon you, son. Wherever you may be.

------

Xen stumbled out into the cold night, narrowing his eyes against the moon’s fierce light. A figure or two was hurrying away; a merchant leading his cart away for the next day’s work and a woman ushering her child into their home’s doorstop. Xen admired the mother for a moment. How I wish…if only I could have felt…no…there is no time. I must find her. He turned he looked around and spied city guards coming, one coming from his left and right. Scribbling quickly on his board, he waited for the two guards to near him before he approached them.

‘Good day, citizen. It be best if you head home. Bandits and their like enjoy this unholy hour,’ One of the guards said.

Xen held up his board. Have you seen a girl pass here?

‘Ah…’ The guard said, staring at Xen curiously. ‘What sort of girl would you be looking for? I hope it isn’t one of them from the brothels. I would have you know stranger, it is illegal in these parts.’

‘Too bad though,’ The other said, looking wishfully at the sky. ‘I heard its not in Raem.’

‘Not what?’

‘Not illegal.’

‘Oh.’ Short pause. ‘Is it true?’

‘Don’t know. It’s what I’ve heard anyway.’

Xen waved his board to get their attention. She looks like a bard. She should have…(erase)...just passed one of you…

‘Hmmm…that is different. I have not. Have you?’ One of the guards said.

The other scratched his chin. ‘Was she wearing a red cap? And was a head shorted than me? Looked a little skinny? Had long…’

Xen nodded, hurrying off down the street, stuffing his board into the satchel. One of the guards called after him. ‘You are welcome!’ His shadow lapped at his heels as he kept an eye out for the bard. Street after street he searched but soon, his breath came in short gasps. He leaned against a wall to regain it. He heard a soft whistle and looked up to see the bard herself, walking towards him. Carefully, he walked over to her, holding out a flute.

‘Thank you, Xen. I would have been lost without this,’ The bard said, gently reaching for the flute.

Xen nodded shyly, releasing the flute into her grip. He stiffened. Quickly pulling the board from his satchel, he took out a piece of chalk and began to scribble. How do you know my name? The bard chuckled. ‘If you too were blind I would have forgiven you.’ There was a short bout of silence as Xen stood there in confusion. A crow fluttered above, cawing. ‘Perhaps the night overshadows my shortcoming and for that I may be grateful. Xen, I am blind.’

‘You be right, missy,’ A voice said as three figures emerged from the shadows. ‘You be too right.’

#

‘You be stop dreaming!’ The bandit shouted and Xen blinked. ‘Now…this will be quick. Hand over yer gold and we will be on our way.’ Xen turned to the bard who was standing quietly behind the bandit leader while his two followers held her none too gently. What should I do…? I…I dare not… Images flared through his head; a woman, fire, screams, bodies. Bodies…everywhere…death… ‘I believe some good screaming will help. Since you can’t scream, your friend here will be doing all the screaming.’

Xen took a step forward but the bandit threw him back into the wall. ‘No one moves until I say so.’ The bandit leaned forward and Xen could smell his rotting breath. ‘Understand?’ Xen cringed at the inevitable. ‘Understand!? Answer me!’

‘YOU WILL NOT MOVE UNTIL I SAY SO,’ Xen spoke softly and it was as if the world paused to consider the weight of those words; the winds hushed, the animals stilled and the waters of the Dwear River froze in anticipation. There was a strong rushing of the wind under that bridge and a muffled cry. The bandit lifted his hands, perhaps to beg for mercy as his flesh turned grey. He tried to pull away from Xen but instead fell backwards, breaking into pieces of stone. His head stopped in front of the other two, features of horror etched upon his face forever.

The two screamed, casting their weapons aside. Heavy footsteps sounded on the pavement. ‘Who goes there!? Thieves, bandits, brigands! Cast aside your weapons and come out peaceably.’

‘The city guard,’ One of the bandits whispered. ‘We must hurry away…’ The two ran alongside the river and jumped into it, using the current to speed their escape. The city guards’ footsteps soon faded into the distance and the sound of chirping crickets began anew. Xen fell to the ground; his shoulder’s shaking more from sorrow than from the cold. I have done it again…why…why are the gods so cruel to one such as I? Do they now enjoy my torment as I wallow in self pity? When will this end…? Must I depart from this world before I obtain my rest…?

A soft hand touched his knee, his head and then his shoulder. ‘Xen, this was all meant to be.’

Xen looked at her with teary eyes. The bard nodded. ‘Yes…I know of your…curse as you would think it to be. But rejoice. For today the fates decree that they be changed. And I am here to rewrite it for you. Will you use this power of yours to help me restore this world to its rightful place?’

Xen stared at her for a moment before breaking into a smile. The bard returned it. ‘Ah yes. Fear not. There will be two others who will join us and they will help me read your writing. Xen…’ He felt her hand gingerly clasped his face and lightly touch his chin. ‘…your power is not a coincidence. It is a gift and if not used, you squander this chance to make use for the good of all.’ She sighed. ‘Know that I cannot force you to do what you do not want to. In time, perhaps…I may win your trust yet. But for now I can only ask, will you come with me?’

What choice do I have? Get a good companion and you get a good goal and something to look forward to, the inn keeper had said. Xen nodded slowly. Why not? I have nothing to lose and it will be good to have someone to talk to. Hopefully once I meet these other two, I will be able to speak better to her.

‘Good! Then it will be best if we leave immediately. We will need to make our way to Raem. Can you send us there?’ The bard asked. Xen opened his mouth just as the bard laid her hand on it. ‘And yes…my name is Kien.’

Nice to meet you. Xen bowed. ‘WE ARE AT THE GATES OF RAEM.’ And in a ripple of time, the world beneath their feet shifted and they were, leaving the space below the bridge empty. The town of Dwear slept soundly once again with the sound of crickets chirping because everyone knew that cricket chirping meant the end of a good, ordinary day.

Moans and groans ^^

Had this up on word but couldn't put it on Blogger until today.
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10/5

Sigh…today has been an amazing day. Today, I found friends where I never knew I had any. ^^ In a sense…

If you ever wondered (you being you church people,RC-ers, Revivalites) or looked at me at worship or prayer and think, wow this guy’s goes it all together. He’s the perfect package. Well great news for you, you are looking at a great failure. Here are some did you know facts.

Did you know…

1) I almost became a gangster if not for God’s influence in my early primary years? I joined this gang and if not for God’s awakening call, I would have continued down the path of smoking and maybe drugs… (Who knows I might have been smarter and joined some Ah long gang or even the mafia)

2) I used to chant magical spells (Stay away from Harry Potter, people) and wished; wished that I could tamper with spirits and magic, etc.? If not for God’s intervention through a Sunday school teacher there as well, I would have delved into the Internet to look for actual spells and ended on a path of witchcraft (Yes, people. Witchcraft is real. You will have power but there is a price to pay. Eternal suffering and also don’t think just because you can control demons you are their master. Did you know a very famous top witch in America was tortured by demons while her private demons did nothing to help because she failed to do her job? Yes, my friends, witchcraft isn’t you TV thing and once you delve into it, it will get harder and harder to get out of it. Only the power of Jesus, His name and His blood can set you free.

3) I am the most forgetful person in the world? You should check out the amount of my reminders. ^^

4) when the newer people came into church and we started seeming to click here and there, I was always left out? Because people saw me as the sissy, holy do-gooder.

Which reminds me.

5) that when I helped organize a church youth camp, not only did I do almost all of the work as the worship assistant but I barely received any recognition at camp? (Not that I wanted any but the worse part was, the actual worship coordinator (Don’t worry it’s not your fault) was the one that seemed to be praised and made the decisions pertaining to worship and also was given the honour of holding the hall keys for worship practices. I barely felt like I had done anything at all and that I was given the task of being committee member for fun.

I felt horrible at the camp as well because there was no one to talk to. Everyone seemed to be grouping into their own clicks and I didn’t have one. I never seemed to be like…one of those cool ones that everybody liked and talked to and you know could be comfortable with.

And to top all of that, at the end of the camp when we were returning the instruments to their place in the church hall, I found out that throughout the whole camp I was being called a sissy behind my back. Wonderful huh?

6) that when I led a worship session at one of the Youth Alive conferences I had my back up singers speaking about how bad I was in front of me? Cool huh? (Thank God that whole chapter of my life is over)

7) that as a leader I get scolded a lot by both Ps. Lisa and Sis. Yoon Foen for slipping up on a lot of things (Still am actually)? (Especially when I seem to be blur most of the time and that gets me in a lot of trouble. Sigh… Sometimes I wonder if I have some mental problem with keeping focus or something like that.

8) that after a certain camp I was scolded by someone in church for spending too much time with my Christian Fellowship members and not mixing with the church members? And to top that, I was being scolded on the other side by my Teacher Advisor in CF as well?

Can you imagine the things I go through serving God? Still think the Christian walk is a bed of roses?

9) that I made the CF land itself into a RM 8000 deficit after our Easter concert? And I also screwed up the whole committee and now they seemed to have distanced themselves away from me because of what I did (not leading well)

10) that I am constantly scolded at home for not keeping up with my studies or not seeming to be studying? (Wow. I shattered my “nerdy studier” mirror already) Yes…I also get into a lot of fights with my dad and mum over certain bits of principal which I feel strongly against (Don’t worry we always patch up real well after that)

11) that I am not allowed out of the house after 12 AM? And also, during my teen years, (13 and above) I have only went to a friend’s house about 2 times and went out to movies about 2 times as well because I can’t get out of the house. My parents want us home and occasionally my mum says that we should spend more time with the family because we will be leaving them soon.

I can’t even go out every Saturday because I have worship practices twice a month (Sometimes 3 times a month) and the other Saturdays I usually aren’t allowed out or my friend’s are busy. I can’t go out on Fridays also because I have cell/homegroup or youth combines. And my parents complain if I go out on free Saturdays and they ask me why I go out so often.

I see movies with my friends nowadays once in…4 maybe 5 months. If I try even once in two weeks my parents will start murmuring why I have to go out so often.

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And those few are only the few that I can remember at the moment. Can you imagine living my life? And I am sure some of you have lived worse lives then me but THAT’S NOT THE POINT! The fact is this is a glimpse into my life and also to show you how I became who I am today.

There is hope for you still. Please… Don’t give up on your life just because of what you are going through or so on… My life hasn’t been perfect and full of mistakes but I have learnt two things from it.

1) That I am forever human and therefore know that without God I am nothing

2) That God alone is trustworthy and that no matter who it is, whether it is my leaders, pastors, some great evangelist I cannot trust them. Because they are human too. The only thing I can trust is God and His word alone. (I’m not saying don’t listen to their advice. Sometimes they are right or God uses them to speak to you. The point is…take whatever they say and bring it to God. Ask Him if it is His word to us or not. Remember, NEVER TRUST A HUMAN! ONLY GOD!)

And God has never let me down. Those mistakes of mine has helped me to see things in a different perspective and given me the courage to face people’s comments. Now I won’t care if people think I am so Holy Man or some “prayer guy” or some “Bible prophet”, because only God matters now.

Oh and if you are wondering why I can remember Christian songs so well it is because I never EVER listen to any other songs but Christian songs. Why? All other songs are too shallow. Why in the world would I want to sing something like “It’s my life. It’s now or never. I don’t want to live forever” when I know that my life belongs to God. Or songs like “the greatest love of all is loving to love yourself”. How can you say that you selfish *****!? Yep. So…oh ya. It’s not that I totally like shut the radio off or something like that. It’s just that I don’t dwell on them. Meaning I don’t listen to them when I am down or like constantly keep them in my phone for reference.

And yes, I do enjoy certain songs not from the Christian world. Favourite artist? Delta Goodrem! ^^ One of them at any rate.

Some people might wonder...

…

11/5

Stopped halfway last night and so I shall continue on today. Sigh… Anyways, today was my first time in Pavilion(sp?). Sad…yes…I know…It was nothing different. Just more expensive and…cleaner looking? But the old feeling has resurfaced again. Sigh… Time and time again I think I have overcome it but comes back again and again. Always at places like this or at Times Square or Sungai Wang or KLCC. The feeling that I cannot find who I am or rather look like how I want to look like…

I mean, the times when I observe other people in these places and I tell myself “Wow! I want hair/clothes/shoes/pants/accessories/a look like that.” But then as I try on similar things I never seem to get it right. I never seem to be able to find the things that really match me. That’s probably the real problem at its root. I hate people to define me but then again I can’t even define myself because I don’t know what I want. Maybe because I keep on asking God to do His will in my life that I don’t seem to have my own will anymore. Is that right?

I mean…well…I just don’t know what I want anymore and all the time, when I admire something I can never get to stick it on me. Take hairstyle for example. I have never been able to get the barber to cut it into the style I want. Even when I bring pictures! Sigh…I…I don’t know. I have this WEIRD problem. I tell myself that I want it but when I approach the sales person, my heart suddenly cringes up and I no longer have a voice to speak. Then I just seem to speak in whispers. It’s so dumb I just wished I could ram my head into the wall after each time. I mean, it’s so stupid. I can’t even speak up for what I want. And don’t get me wrong. I do TRY. I try so hard…but I never seem to be able to get the courage to tell anyone what I want…

Until the point that I just go along with what everyone else tells me to do…

Sigh…

Look at people like my sister for example. She’s younger then me and yet she has the charisma the personality to get what she wants. She does what she wants and doesn’t let anyone else influence her decision unless it a slight deviation. She wanted to study biochemistry and now she is doing that. I wanted to do music or go to bible school and now I am doing law. See the difference? And somehow…let’s say she wants a pair of shoes and she just got two pairs today. For a cheap price at that! And they were exactly what she wanted!

Me on the other hand, when I want shoes, they seem nice when I first try them on but then when I start wearing them, on the second try I just notice that I don’t like them at all and that it was my father’s choice for me all along. Yep. That’s probably my other problem. My dad has this HUGE influential power and constantly influences people into doing what he believes is best for them (Usually he is right except when it comes to dressing but now he is much better in terms of style). My sister can resist most of the time. Me on the other hand am constantly being pushed around because I just CAN’T resist it… He’s just too good and me…I don’t even know what I want… That’s my problem.

That’s probably why I admire my sister(Abi) or Jeremy, John, Nicholas, Daniel Loo(church), Aaron, Paul(CF)… They have the personality. They know what they want and do what they please… Me… I just wished I had what they have… They seem to be able to carry themselves and their personalities, wants and desires wherever they go…

I just wish people would STOP TELLING ME WHAT I SHOULD DO! I am fed up of that! Of being told of what I can, cannot, should, should not do! Who cares! It’s my life! Only God is allowed because He is all knowing. But then again… I don’t know what I want. And I don’t know how to find out what I want. I just feel so lost… Sigh…

I never seem to get anything right as well. Clothes, dressing, hair, appearance. Oh that reminds me. The other reason I admire the people at the top because they seem to be able to connect with everyone… Look at Kears for instance. I have been in the church WAY before his time and yet he knows more about everyone else compared to me… I am just sitting at the side of the road with people coming to talk to me out of pity or because I happen to be standing where they are standing… I just CANNOT find the right words to say. Look at Nicholas or Daniel Loo or Jeremy for example. They can’t just make jokes or make other people laugh or make them feel at home.

Me? I just make people feel cold and wonder why they got trapped in the lift with the “Holy-sissy-knowitall”. I just don’t know what to say. And when I try to make a joke it seems to be (From what I see at any rate because no one seems to be able to understand me) too intellectual or deep for people to understand… I TRY…I really do… But I just can’t seem to speak normally. I remember incidents in camp where I am called to lead some group or act in some play and I can never seem to make people laugh with acting or some joke. My strong point seems to be being serious or making people cry when they confess their sins or things like that…

That’s why I tone myself down to the lowest most degrading level possible. So that if I can’t tell a joke at least I can make myself the joke. It will catch some smiles and good humour at least… Sigh… I write this through growing tears… It seems to be an issue close to heart and yet I wait and wait for an answer from God but receive none…

Oh and that other thing… Fine. I wouldn’t mind being called some “holy-knowitall-prayer guy” if I had God’s power to back me up. You know… miracles, fire from heaven, angelic visitations, seeing God face to face, hearing God’s audible voice… But the problem is I have NEVER had a spiritual encounter of that kind before. Never… Only God’s gentle…gentle…nudging or voice… Even like…I don’t have pastors calling our my name or prophesying some great event over my life. No…most of the prophecies have nothing to do with my future… Where’s justice then? Where is my justice…?

Oh Lord… Where is my vindication? Where are You when I need You? Why make me different from other people when I don’t have Your power or authority to back me up? Thousands others have countless of miraculous things happening to them, pastors or church members having miracles healings, or other friends of mine met at camp where they have seen hell/heaven or been called out by name by pastor’s because of some great destiny God has for their lives…

Did you know that Christian circles have “in crowds” as well? The pastors are of course there. And then there are the people you see on stage, in worship or praying or doing altar call ministry laying hands on people… These seem to be God’s anointed ones. And the fact is, I’m not in there.

So where is justice for me then!? To be different and yet no different. People like me are usually called freaks. Famous ones of our kinds who have the destiny placed upon them are called geniuses. We are just freaks. Different. People you wish you weren’t caught in the lift in because the only thing you can say to them is “hi” and :bye”.

I truly thank God when the people mentioned above congratulate me or allow me into their conversations or just don’t mind me around. Coz then I get to share a small bit of what I have been craving in their lives. Even if it’s just to laugh at their jokes and not be able to contribute any. Or sit at their tables at dinner and share in the fellowship there…

And thank you Daniel Loo for that Saturday(10/5). It really meant a lot to me… Sigh… I remember the time when the church was smaller and the senior class (Nicholas, Beatrice, Serene, me, Daniel Loo, Alan…) we were together, one group, happy, and so close to each other… We did everything together and I loved and missed that. Now that the church is bigger we seem to be drifting further and further…

I seem to be holding and fighting for the last few strands of relationship that I shared with you… Especially since the new people came in… My heart is torn now… I can no longer be part of any circle as I belong in none. Perhaps this is what it means to be part of God’s circle. That I can even be rejected by fellow Christians for doing the right thing…

Perhaps what Ps. Gerald (sp?) said is right as well… we have to give our dreams and desires all to God and ask Him what He ones in their place… And it’s so painful… because that is all I have left for myself…and soon…I have nothing left of me…

Perhaps you read this wondering why this is such a long post, why this has nothing to do with you or that you don’t understand what I am trying to say. For me…I can only cry and wail in my room, alone with my God until my heart is empty and the sorrow hides in some corner of my heart, waiting to be unleashed and built up again…

Lord…

Where is my justice…?

Last post...for now... (Can you answer the question?)

A friend of mine sent this to me. I can't believe I'm dumber than a four year old...try not to scroll down until you have actually had a good time thinking.

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Are you smarter than a four year old?

A PRE-SCHOOL TEST FOR YOU

Which way is the bus below traveling?

To the left or to the right?








Can't make up your mind?

Look carefully at the picture again.














Still don't know?

Primary school children were shown this picture and asked the same question.

90% of them gave this answer:

'The bus is traveling to the right.'

When asked, 'Why do you think the bus is traveling to the right?'

They answered:

'Because you can't see the door to get on the bus.'






How do you feel now???

I know, me too.

Edit: Had to put in the pic again. Wasn't showing up earlier

Randomness!!

Ok...since there is this latest craze about random question I thought might as well lighten the mood of this sad looking blog by adding these questions. There are two segments, one for church and one for CF.

CF
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1. Who's Lik Ee dating?
10 Imaginary girls who like whacking him (I'm not too sure why 10. Abi suggested)

2. If Abi and Jason were locked in the same (really small) room for longer than a day, what would most likely happen?
They would probably be talking about Jesus the entire day and be raptured before the rest of us (what were you thinking people?)

3. What is Abi's favorite TV show or movie?
CSI

4. Is Wan Si your best friend?
Define 'best'. Yes Wan Si. No doubts. Peace out ^^

5. Describe Abi in one word.
Abi-ness

6. Can Aaron be bad influence?
He can be influence all right. It depends what you mean by bad. Is randomness a disease?

7. What advice would you give Ms Angeline?
This is kinda awkward...erm...Keep doing your best?

8. Name something you have in common with Wan Si?
We are human. :p Kidding there are so many other things. Had to point out the obvious

9. What musical instrument would Lik Ee most likely play?
The saxophone

10. If Clement played in a movie, what kind of character would they play?
Erm...the guy by the side of the road or in the subway with a guitar and a hat out for alms

11. What is one thing Aaron isn't exactly made for?
Sanity

12. How would Xi Ying insult Joram?
I think it would be the other way round. (The question only features a scenario in Xi Ying's nightly dreams...)

13. What would you do if Joram confessed love to you?
I am not worthy...

14. What's your fondest memory of Mr Ken?
Is he dead?

15. Would you love to read Mr Ken's very personal diary?
If I could get away with it

16. Do you love Joram?
Has the question generator have something against me having a normal relationship?

17. What song could be Xi Ying's theme song?
This is how we overcome

18. If your sibling and Anna Grace teamed up, what would they most likely accomplish?
World domination or...pollution, lots of it

19. What is or would be a good nickname for Ms Angeline?
Erm....huh?

20. Michelle suddenly knows all your secrets. What do you have to say about that?
Get away from me... I am a sinner... ^^

21. Can Michelle be bad influence?
Bad...bad...? *splutters* That can't even begin to describe...She redefines the word 'bad'!

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Church
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1. Justin is actually Justin in disguise, you know.
Justin Timberlake you mean... Nope! Don't believe you

2. If you could do anything with Jarred, what would it be?
Erm...stay 5 feet away from me. Let's be friends...ok...?

3. Who would be a better superhero sidekick between Sui Li and Jarred, and why?
Sui Li most likely. Jarred always has something on Fridays. (who's going to save the world then?)

4. Do you trust Brandon?
Please tell me this is from a scale of one to ten

5. If Shannon and Brandon teamed up, what would they most likely accomplish?
Chaos. Speculatively, one would try to compromise the other would compromise to try

6. Is Oliver your best friend?
Yeah. Got a problem with that?

7. Have you ever been in Oliver's house?
Erm...can't remember...

8. Does Brandon make you hot?
In...what way?

9. Justin suddenly knows all your secrets. What do you have to say about that?
Then you would know I kill people who know all my secrets

10. Do you love God?
Is this a trick question?

11. Who is Beatrice's best friend?
Erm...

12. What do you think about Vandana?
Whatever Oliver thinks of her divided by half

13. Super fun fun adventure amusement park marathon with you, Iggy and Justin! How will it go?
It would never start because Iggy would be cheering us on, Justin would be moping around wondering why he got himself into such a mess and I would be wondering who I would be racing with

14. What musical instrument would Oliver most likely play?
Duh!

15. What would you do if Oliver and your better half were going out?
I would be wondering why he would be taking a guy out as well :p

16. Do you do anything special with Justin?
Hmm...

17. Justin and Beatrice are forced to roleplay out a verbal couple fight. Who gets to play the wife?
It's quite obvious. Justin of course~!

18. What's your fondest memory of Angeline?
Erm...I know! Playing 'sep-sep-sep' in BCM! Hahahahahaha!

19. Do you think Jeremy is a virgin?
Mentally or physically?

20. If Kevan and Sis. Yoon Foen were locked in the same (really small) room for longer than a day, what would most likely happen?
We would have a piano seminary!

21. If John Reuben played in a movie, what kind of character would they play?
Anything that would make the girls jump off their seats screaming his name

22. What advice would you give Kevan?
When's the big day? ^^

23. Super fun fun adventure amusement park marathon with you, Iggy and Angeline! How will it go?
Again!? (Tip: Keep away from this amusement park)

24. Who would you rather get stuck in handcuffs with, Lionel or Daniel Loo?
Daniel Loo. I KNOW what Lionel does with handcuffs :p

25. If Shawn and Lionel were locked in the same (really small) room for longer than a day, what would most likely happen?
I know someone would lose...and it wouldn't be Sha... CENSORED ^^

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Hahahahaha! Ok. Those are todays random questions. Sorry. I can't up with funny liners under pressure. No offence but only good, clean fun to all those mentioned above. You know I love you. :p

Warning and musing

Sigh… the peace of God truly surpasses all understanding. Phillipians 4:6 and 7 points out “Do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Simply said, I have been worrying about not worrying and… now I know why. I guess I have been worrying and praying so much that I forgot to wait for the answer. (Happens to a lot of other people as well I know. We pray so much for a miracle that we forget to thank God for it in advance or even keep an eye out for it.) Now I am wholly confident to enter the exam halls although a little jittery or rather nervous but that’s good. Wouldn’t be human if I entered without any fear, would I?

But that is beside the point. After another powerful prayer meeting with my college’s Christian Fellowship, we went out for a good mamak and fellowship session and suddenly a thought struck me. (Btw, if you are wondering if there are coincidences from the Christian perspective, no. There aren’t any. There is only the will of God and the consequences of Man’s actions. Christianity is a relationship with the LIVING FATHER not a religion. Never meant to be and never have been.)

A little off topic but I was kind of wondering, don’t you think the current, modern church has reverted from its Protestant roots back to Pharisee style teaching? Why do I say that? Well, back in the Pharisee days, inter alia (amongst others), they taught and the people listened. That kinda seems to be happening to the church today. The pastor preaches and people listen. But the Christian walk is not about coining cool titles, names or having cool accessories but rather about a PERSONAL relationship with God. Notice the word, PERSONAL. We can’t be living on the pastor’s words alone and not have our own personal convictions.

Here’s a little secret for you.

Pastors are human too. And there are times to interpret the Bible wrongly. That’s why the Bible says “Test the spirits”. (Which means right now you should be testing what I say as well. These are my personal convictions. Not that they are wrong but they are just what God has taught me. Differing views of a God too huge to be easily catalogued) True they are biblically trained and all but they are still human, no higher than us and no cleaner or better. Seeing it in that light, respect them for the burden they carry and the anointing of God of course but have your OWN walk with the Lord. You wouldn’t want to be burning in Hell with them just because they were wrong would you?

And yes, Christians can also go to Hell. This is a scary bit and I hope you WAKE UP. The Christian walk is not about church and reading the Bible. Again, the Christian walk is a personal walk with GOD! Luke 14:24 to 28 points out Jesus’ words where he says “Make every effort to enter through the narrow door, because MANY(This I highlight to make my point), will try to enter and will not be able to. Once the owner of the house gets up and closes the door, you will stand outside knocking and pleading, “Sir, open the door for us.”

But he will answer, “I don’t know you or where you come from.”

Then you will say, “We ate and drank WITH YOU, and you taught in OUR streets.”

But he will reply, “I don’t know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evildoers!”

There will be weeping there, and gnashing of teeth, when you see Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, but you yourselves thrown out.”

Sad huh? Notice that when the people replied “We ate and drank WITH YOU, and you taught in OUR streets” it sort of seems that they barely knew God. It’s like they said, “Eh that day I got spend that one mamak meeting with you what. And remember last year’s church camp when you came to preach, I also was there what. How come you don’t know me?”

The answer is simple. You don’t know Him and haven’t made an effort to. That’s why Jesus says in Revelations that He will spit lukewarm Christians out of His mouth. Like my CF(Christian Fellowship) President pointed out today that normal Christian go to hell. Normal in the sense that they come to church, Cell/Home/Youth Group, seem to be serving well in several ministries, tithing, giving regular large amounts of offering and so on. Why doesn’t God value those? He does but if you don’t have a PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP with God, you would be doing all these things out of ulterior motives or because you feel obligated. And mind you…

That will earn you a first class ticket to Hell.

[Pause for effect]

Scary huh? Sorry to put this so bluntly but it’s happening in a lot of churches because Satan has managed to penetrate the church and unless you yourself do something about it, you are not going to be very safe.

Do take into account that God is a merciful God and one full of grace but do realize that there is a time limit to things and the people who end up in Hell are those who have heard the gospel several times but have rejected it after understanding it fully or those who do ministry out of jealously, greed, pride, etc. and not genuine love for God.

So put away all your idols and start connecting with this living God. How? Here are some things that helped me.

1)Read His word and ask Him to speak to you. (Don’t worry if you fall asleep halfway or something along that line. He is a God full of grace AND he made us. He knows we get tired or just can’t concentrate most of the time) Don’t worry if the reading seems boring. In order to finish the Bible you cannot imagine the torture I went through. (Sorry Lord but you know all those horrible nights…horrible…) It was like trying to squeeze things from God’s Word when He was trying to tell me something else. But soon He began to speak more to me when I allowed Him to do the leading instead and now He speaks to me every time I open the Word.

2) Get connected with people who really love God as well. This will help you learn more from each other though I would advice you to be on your guard at all times. NEVER EVER TRUST ANYONE BUT THE WORD OF GOD! That’s because His word will never lead you falsely but people get confused or misinterpret the Word or are just plain members of some cult group which they themselves probably don’t know about or realize. Be on your guard and again “Test the spirits.”

3) Constantly talk to Him. Whether it’s in the bus or train or even in the shower. It doesn’t have to be out loud (God can hear your thoughts. Satan can’t. Mwhahahahaha! How the enemy seems to be able to nail you so well with gloomy, lusty, ‘kill yourself’, ‘you are worthless’ thoughts is because he probably has some agent watching you ever since birth so they know your character pretty well. Scary huh?) Don’t be afraid to pray and so on so forth. It’s just talking. Don’t worry about big vocab and all that. If you are wondering how you can develop that, simple. These big vocab fellas are either people who have learnt to use Scripture and the leading of the Spirit in spiritual warfare (This is a whole different topic. I will not touch on anything else here for the moment at least) or people who just want to impress everyone.

The second group better get your act together before you lose your ticket to heaven as well. Anyways, get to know God. You will realize He is the funniest person you will ever get to know and the wisest as well. You can imagine the things He tells me. Earth shaking. And if you think you are a ‘mature enough’, then you are not. The Christian cannot NEVER finish learning because he/she learns from an infinite God who will NEVER run out of things to teach. You may return to one verse again and again and the funniest things is that you will realize things in there you never saw before. Cool huh?

I think that’s about it. Can’t really think of anything else to add in addition to these three. But yeah, please, start now. Don’t wait for tomorrow or next week. It’s never too late or early. Each day could bring new challenges where you need the power of God to intervene.

----------

Anyways, back to the thought that struck me at the mamak session. Have you heard of the ‘Six Degrees of Separation’ theory. It came out in that TV series known as ‘Six Degrees’ (How boring can a name get?) What the theory says is that every person is connected to every other person on the planet through six people. For example:

Eg: I am connected to Zac Efron with the following diagram.

Danny – Mum – Mum’s Friend A(Producer of local shows) – A’s son (Moved to America and has started acting there) – A’s wife (director of a show Zac Efron acts in) – Zac Efron

Cool huh? I think this is how it works. Didn’t really get a good read at it but if this were true can you imagine the implications? If we were able to teach everyone around us to influence the people around them, you could impact the whole world by influencing everyone and teaching them to spread that teaching and influencing others. Confusing?

Simply put, can you imagine the impact you have on people’s lives? If I let’s say believe that Hollywood movies are too fake and I tell my mum. Then she tells her friend who in turn tells his son when his son returns back from his holidays who in turn tells his wife which impacts the movie she is directing with Zac Efron in it.

Amazing? I think so too.

That would mean we have to watch our words and actions well. Think of the impact we would have on the whole world. That’s why even touching one person with the truth of God’s love is so important. You’ll never know who he/she would impact next with God’s teachings or principles or even stories of your testimonies and life. You’ll never know when you would be impacting the next Billy Graham or Ps. Cho. Each life can change the world and it it’s imperative(vital/important) that we live the life God has called us to live and also help everyone in need and treat everyone with love and respect. Never turn away even one person.

USHERS! Your ministry is the most important. You are the first face or first contact people usually have with any church. Don’t drive them away. Each and everyone is precious to God. I once heard a story that if an usher of a church had driven away Ghandhi(sp?) from the church doorstep when he was seeking for the truth just because of the colour of his skin. Can you imagine what Ghandhi(sp?) could have done to change the nation and ultimately the world with the God’s love message?

So remember, keep a careful watch on your life and remember, if you have submitted everything into God’s hands what makes you think anything can go wrong. If they do go wrong, it’s because God has something BETTER in store for you. How cool is that? A win win situation ALWAYS.

May the Love of the Father be with you and keep you safe…

-Ellipsis-

This is a must for everyone! I feel like crying now

I got this from an email. I think it's a true story. Sigh...
--------------------------------

This is beautiful! Try not to cry.

She jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room.
She said: "How is my little boy? Is he going to be all right?
When can I see him?"
The surgeon said, "I'm sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn't make it."
Sally said, "Why do little children get cancer?
Doesn't God care any more?
Where were you, God, when my son needed you?"
The surgeon asked, "Would you like some time alone with your son? 
One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes, before he's transported to the university."
Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said good bye to her son. She ran her fingers lovingly through his thick red curly hair.
"Would you like a lock of his hair?" the nurse asked.
Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the boy's hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.

The mother said, "It was Jimmy's idea to donate his body to the University for Study. He said it might help somebody else.
"I said no at first, but Jimmy said, 'Mom, I won't be using it after I die. Maybe it will help some other little boy spend one more day with his Mom."
She went on, "My Jimmy had a heart of gold. Always thinking of someone else. Always wanting to help others if he could."

Sally walked out of Children's Mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending most of the last six months there.
She put the bag with Jimmy's belongings on the seat beside her in the car. The drive home was difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty house.
She carried Jimmy's belongings, and the plastic bag with the lock of his hair to her son's room.
She started placing the model cars and other personal things back in his room exactly where he had always kept them.
She laid down across his bed and, hugging his pillow, cried herself to sleep. It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Laying beside her on the bed was a folded letter.

The letter said: "Dear Mom, I know you're going to miss me; but don't think that I will ever forget you, or stop loving you, just 'cause I'm not around to say "I Love You" .

I will always love you, Mom, even more with each day. Someday we will see each other again. Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, that's okay with me.
He can have my room and old stuff to play with.
But, if you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the same things us boys do.

You'll have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like, you know. Don't be sad thinking about me. This really is a neat place. Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I go t here and showed me around some, but it will take a long time to see everything.

The angels are so cool. I love to watch them fly. And, you know what? Jesus doesn't look like any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw Him, I knew it was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD! And guess what, Mom? I got to sit on God's knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody important.

That's when I told Him that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you good bye and everything. But I already knew that wasn't allowed. Well, you know what Mom? God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter.

I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to you. God said for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him 'Where was He when I needed him?'
"God said He was in the same place with me, as when His son Jesus was on the cross.

He was right there, as He always is with all His children. Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what I've written except you. To everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool? I have to give God His pen back now.

He needs it to write some more names in the Book of Life. Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper. I'm sure the food will be great.  Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I don't hurt anymore. The cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and God couldn't stand to see me hurt so much, either.
That's when He sent The Angel of Mercy to come get me. The Angel said I was a Special Delivery! How about that? Signed with Love from God, Jesus & Me. 

( Let's see Satan stop this one.)

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Guys, let this story storm the web coz imagine...just imagine the implications...

I can't wait for heaven ^^

A thought with many branches

As it gets closer to the exams, I am now beginning to worry that I do not seem to be feeling any sense of strain or build up to the exam which worries me even more. In the sense that a guy should be worried when he has four papers to do from the 21st of May to the 2nd of June with 3 hours and four questions for each paper. And the fact is…more than half usually fail these intermediate exams. Although the interesting thing is…I don’t know…maybe it’s the peace of God.

I have been praying about the exams…maybe it’s His way of telling me not to worry but just to do my best.

Have you ever wondered what geniuses feel like being who they are? I mean prodigies and the like. I mean, let us just say you…you are painting and you are 6. You put in what you like, splash some bits here and there and remembered that cartoon you saw last Saturday and you really liked the cute little things in the show. So you go ahead and draw, try for a few simple circles with the crayon and dab a little here and there. You leave for a glass of water, asking if your dad can help you reach it when you hear your mom screaming from the living room.

Your dad disappears in a flash, leaving you to try to turn the tap off the water cooler before the water drips of the sides of the table and you get scolded like last week for trying to wash your hands like that. You manage to turn it off, gently pull the cup and as some of the wobbling water spills onto the table you see your parents hovering beside you and it looks like they just saw a ghost.

Your dad’s mouth wobbles and goes, “Did…hun…honey…dear…did you…erm…draw this…?’

Wondering if painting is also a sin (You just finished up last year’s Christmas paint. The expensive one you requested for), you stare at both of them and your brain goes into max mode, trying its best to work some lie into the correct angle.

“Don’t worry sweetie,” Your mum smiles a little. A little insincere, you think. “We just want to know.”

Your brain tries truth. “Erm…yep…mummy…I’m sorry I finished the paint…’ A little tear rolls down your apple cheeks which no one seems able to keep their hands off. Mummy quickly bends down and hugs you. You can still smell the sweet shampoo in her hair, the one you tried to pour down the toilet bowl last month. “Oh sweety. We just want you to know that it’s…it’s…great…amazing…”

Left trying to figure out the word ‘amazing’, your mum stands up and you don’t hear your mum asking your dad if they should contact the local art gallery.

---------------

Yup. And so that little girl’s life is changed for ever and she becomes the world’s youngest Picasso painter. But have you ever wondered how they feel? When reporter’s storm this little girl’s room to get a glimpse of her latest work before the rest of the world does or when they interview her and ask her how she does it she wonders “Why in the world is everyone so interested in something I don’t see as extraordinary. I don’t even put extra effort into it. Everyone should be able to do it. Right…?’

But no… sadly the world pounces on them as if they were some alien specimen to be studied or envies them, treating them as if they were begging whenever they came to shop for bread. It’s sad that this destroy most of their lives and even sadder that there ARE many geniuses out there just unannounced. Did you know you were one of them too?

God has given each of us an amazing array of talents and each of us excel at something. Different combination of talents produce varied talents. That’s why the education system is so important. It handles thousands upon thousands of young lives, each and everyone who has the potential to excel at something. But instead, this OFFICIAL SLAVERY squishes and downsizes and kills all those who cannot excel at books.

And that is plain wrong! Why do you think America produces so much raw talent? (Not that I am saying they’ve got it all together) The fact is, they allow their students as much freedom as they please, only forcing them through the bare essentials of life. I mean take maths for example.

Why in the world would I need to know how much x in 3x+2xy=4 is when the most maths I am going to use when I leave school is how much do I get back if the item is 12.35 after tax and I paid 20?

IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE!

Then the counter argument is always [Whiny voice] “But the children don’t know what they want to do…?”

Well they would if you let them experience the world more! Let them try reading, writing, drawing, heck even the computer! Who knows? Your child, brother, cousin, niece could be the next Bill Gates? If they fail, encourage them to the point they want to try something else!

That’s probably the other problem. Or two problems for that matter.

1) I want my child to be, inter alia (Legal term for amongst others), a lawyer, doctor, engineer, scientist

GET A LIFE! Your child can be whatever he or she wants to be without you needing to force some medicine studies down their little throats. All because of what? [Whiny voice returns] “But then…how will I show my face to other parents when I tell them my son is a toy maker?”

Who cares!? As long as they aren’t some garbage man (No offence guys and gals out there. There is still hope. You’ll never know when you may find the next 1 million dollar blank cheque(sp?) and you really are doing all of us a great favour) and making money/living life the way they want to, who are you to interfere in their lives!? If they fail, your role is to

[Climatic drum roll]

ENCOURAGE! Not to stand there and [Whiny voice] “I told you so. I told you so.” For the love of God, they are still your children. Encourage them and ask them about their work. Still don’t understand the lingo or how his/her work works, do some research and maybe you’ll be that straw on the camel’s back for some AIDS vaccine, revolutionary 7G phone technology or something like that. Let them live their own lives without you breathing down their necks. Encourage and support.

Not that I am saying you don’t encourage them towards being one of the professionals but don’t nag them towards it. They will go all out to go against you or you may ruin their lives in doing something they don’t want to do.

I know you parents are all out for us having good lives with good paying jobs but ultimately, it’s no longer the 1900s where work was hard to find and bla bla bla. The fact is we want to enjoy what we are doing now not be forced to do it because it pays good. (And if your child is one of those who loves money more than enjoyment of work, YOU, YOU mind you, have been truly blessed by the Father above)

2) My child must be good in everything so I force everything down his throat

This bubbles up as another problem. ARE YOU INSANE!? Stop forcing everything down your child’s throat. He/she has a life to live, a childhood to live. Stop trying to kill them with things they don’t want. As I said above, ENCOURAGE, but don’t push as Brett Manning says “Never push.”

And if they say, “Why didn’t you force me to finish my Grade 8 in the piano? I could have liked it…” Put this through, I did try but you hated it so it’s too bad. Of course, I would recommend only allowing them to choose when they are mature enough. I am a result of one of those push throughs and look where it got me; a blossoming relation with my piano teacher and a Grade 8 cert I can proudly show anyone (Although I cannot play any classicals for you I am sorry. Gotten rusty already but it does help a lot when I lead worship in church. Fyi, I only play four times a month, twice at church practice and twice on the two services themselves :p So sue me)

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So…there somewhat concludes my thoughts at this point. Hope you life the new layout and give me a tinkle on the Shoutbox should you feel yourself too lazy or tired to post something in comments.

In conclusion, please, parents… let your children live their lives and children, youth, guys and girls, live your life to its fullest potential. (You’ve only got one so use it all for God’s glory. If you have not given your life to Jesus Christ, do so immediately. You only have one life but Christ guarantees you an eternal one and also best choices and blessings in every choice in your current life. What better choice is there? It is either a slave to Satan who only wants to “Kill, steal and destroy” or God who gives life and blessings. The choice is simple right? There is no middle gate.

“If you are sitting there and thinking, hey I could always give my life to Christ tomorrow” then Satan’s already won. Who says you won’t die tomorrow or end up in a life-threatening coma? Or even right now, a plane crashes into your house or lightning strikes and your house catches fire?

“If you are sitting there and wondering, why do I need God for? And who says I am Satan’s slave. I ain’t no one’s slave but myself.” You are already given your life to Satan because if God doesn’t rule it, Satan will. Who is Satan then? Besides the all-known view that he is second to God, he is the sensual dance on MTV, the pornography that you subscribe to, the little voice in your head that tells you that it’s good to skip school or that little nudge that moves you to pick up your first cigarette.

Did you think Satan is this red man with horns and a funny tail with a fork? NO! He is extremely gorgeous AND if Satan were to appear before every doorstep people would immediately turn to God knowing this monster’s existence. The point is, Satan rules over your life through a quiet manipulation so you would not even realize you were his slave until it were too late. Remember it’s never too late or too early. Give your life to Jesus Christ now; just believe in your heart and talk to him like any person, say that you confess your sins and are giving your heart and life to Jesus and you will break free from Satan’s bondage of sin and death.

Jesus says in Matthew 11:29 to 30 (New International Version) “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is EASY and my burden is LIGHT.”

He doesn’t discount that he has a yoke (The thing the oxen use when they plough the fields) but that it is easy and light. Why yoke? Because in a way it amounts to ownership. You either throw your lot in with death or with life. Simple.

Sorry a little off topic here but just in case for all you God-loving people out there, God doesn’t mess up plans that aren’t good for you. He gives you talent and makes sure that you love that talent. He will never give you talent that you will hate using.)

But…back to our original topic.

Parents please…guide your children, encourage them, be beside them to help them through the tough pitches in life, love them to bits because no one else human may, and be there for them and always have an interest in their lives but ultimately allow them freedom because the first person who can ruin their lives is themselves

but that second person

is you…

Emo-ish (just realized it only when I re-read it)

Ok…so… while I get my blog together, brace yourselves for a couple of major changes. (so vast you would probably not even recognize it anymore) Still trying to get a hang of the system. But anyways, I have been watching an anime and I believe it is too good to be kept to myself. Title?

Honey and Clover

[Boys gasp] Danny watches such a…girly show? Well…it’s not a girly show. [But…but…but…] It is NOT a girly show. Although the name sounds it all. If you are looking for fighting scenes…hmm… They’re not your Bleach or Naruto usuals. If you are looking for eye candy, this isn’t really the show for it either (I think such shows are called bishonen and bishojo or something along those lines). If you are looking for graphics, the graphics are softer and not your solid coloured anime, giving the show a lighter mood although it handles hard issues very well.

So WHAT is in this show then? Simple.

It is the one show I have seen which reflects life itself. Well I probably like it so much because the issues raised are really what is going through my life as well. Things like needing to grow up in college, friends who really go all out for each other and are just the craziest bunch of people you have ever met, thinking about future plans and what job one should pick, love triangles, friends who might be leaving or the group splitting up because they have work at different places and a host of crazy problems.

Why is this show so special?

There is NO MAIN CHARACTER.

[Pause for effect]

Cool huh? I repeat. There is no main character. (Not really at any rate. The show really throws the focus around but still manages to keep us steady without flooding us with knowledge). And the anime also actually goes through a period of three years. (I haven’t finished it yet but that’s the length so far I believe although the first series is only 24 episodes) But that’s not the whole point. The thing is this show is so well rounded that every single character in the team is well developed and delved into giving you a sense of wholeness. But seriously, the issues I pointed above are really the things that pull you into the show and the way they over-portray the characters’ antics and reactions. (I have never heard so many screams or seen so many popping eyeballs in my life)

It is just the sort of show that you wish you were in. One which anyone going into college life or starting work can relate to. Sigh… I guess it has always been my dream to be able to leave school together with ‘me’ friends and start working together in some huge multinational company started by us. But lately they seem to be drifting away; my school group that is. Honey and clover really reflects what I went through in my secondary years and that is probably why it touches me so badly.

Most of us were librarians (Before moving to other clubs in Form Four) and we really just met up whenever we could. Assembly, recess, after school, holidays, study breaks…Whew! Sigh…I miss those days and I wished the future would be like that too…

But…

Life goes on and there is nothing we can do about it. I only hope and pray to the God Almighty that we meet together in Heaven and there we will be able to accompany each other for all eternity. Father…hear my simple prayer…and draw them to you…

…

Amen.

GeNeSiS

…

A blank page. With so much space and nothing to say. It is always fun to begin something but never end it… Hmmm… Something to ponder I guess. Well, being the first entry into any blog I will lay out the ground rules.

1) Do not expect pictures.

Mwhahahahaha! Sorry but I am not really a picture person. Just expect lots and lots and lots of words! But hopefully with enough skill to paint emotions and some pictures into your head. I will occasionally post things up just don’t expect this to be one of those picture blogs where every entry has a 5:1 ratio of pictures to words.

Eg:

Today was the

(5 pictures of happiness)

happiest

(5 pictures of days)

day of my

(Another 5 pictures for life)

life

----

Why?

Words invoke feeling passion create something that pictures can never fully describe or even fully encompass. The phrase that a picture paints a thousand words is interpreted in not too accurate a standing in the sense that a picture does paint a thousand words but it paints words you will never be able to read or read well for that matter (My personal opinion at any rate). And that in itself kills the purpose of the picture.

2) Do not expect profound sentences and thoughts/ideas in every phrase.

This is a blog. My blog. An ordinary 20 year old human’s blog… Not the Bible or a theologian’s diary. So…I try to keep it light (Pardon my language. It’s what I read. If you cannot even understand these words…Pray that the Father above will enlighten you.

But anyways…I just found out the other Friday at Youth Combine (church youth meeting) that I am a…

Know…it…all…

I wonder now if I should take that as a compliment or an insult. I can hear some of you mentally gasping right now. An insult? Is Danny mad? I would die just to have that title. Well… like it or not I seem to see the title as someone who knows everything but doesn’t really have a close circle of friends. Like…hey…I know it all but that’s the only thing you will ever know about me…

I wonder if it scares people. Maybe it’s the way I speak or the way I carry myself. Btw, I am NOT a know-it-all. I just happen to know more than you. Why? Because I read. Simple. Capish? (sp?) And also because I believe in what I speak. So you will realize (Those of you who have been with me long enough) that I can’t lie very well. [Orchestra brings out a loud brass piece] Yes…confession made… AND DONE WITH! Ok…moving on… ^^

Oh ya. One more thing. I am no language expert so feel free to comment on the spelling and bla bla bla. (sp?) means I’m not really sure of the spelling. Those with no sp’s mean I didn’t realize it.

3) I…can’t think of anything else at the moment. It’s like I burst with ideas before I write and when finally…finally I have the time to write…the amount that comes out barely seems consistent with what I was thinking through…earlier…

Hmmm…

If you wondered why I started this blog. Well…I felt that wherever I am or was, there are times I know the answer to a question, riddle, joke, phrase, things I could have added or thrown into a conversation if only I had opened my lead mouth. If you didn’t know, I am by nature a very shy person. [More powerful climatic music] Yes yes…shy…S-H-Y. I constantly have to force myself out of my comfort zone just to talk to people.

And did you know I enjoy thinking or time alone as well? Not that I enjoy solitude is just that I don’t mind it. And with the right group of people I just can’t stop talking. Who is the right group of people you ask? People who…I don’t know…can just…never mind… Best not bring this up.

But we are really going off the tangent here. In short, this blog is for all those times I could have spoken up or my thoughts for the day or for some time where I feel everyone else should know about. A place you can reach me if my email, Facebook, phone, presence just seems too unreachable. And a place I hope I can reach out to you as well. To truly express myself instead of clamming down and not saying anything…

Sigh…yes…I pray that God give me the strength to speak up but I don’t know…the times when that comes about I just…can’t seem to say anything and when I do…it comes out like German.

Nemo judex in causa sua. No man can be a judge for his own cause. So…feel free to post comments and put something in the shout box…once I put it up or find out how to that…and all the other strange features this blog thingies seem to have and respond. I would like to hear from you as well.

So yes…Thus ends the first post to the Ellipsis’ blog.